Women who fear the hardware store
Eit has been an amazing week. A week in which the trash channel RTL 2 very briefly very proud of announcing a baby docu-soap with the Schurbelsänger Michael Wendler, who had fallen very far from the social sidelines – and of all things the swanky top dogs Carmen and Robert Geiss morally realigned the station. Also became the years of double life of a colleague from the “Handelsblatt” known, who secretly made local politics for the SPD under a slightly different name and with a false beard. We imagine such a double life to be fascinating, if you’re a jewel thief or an author of juicy scandalous novels – but SPD local politicians, seriously?
The actor is also on the road with a false name Kit Harington, whose real name is Christopher Catesby Harington. His parents once gave him his current stage name Kit, writes “In”: They “always called him by his nickname Kit, so that until he was eleven years old he had no idea what his real name was”. Until the age of eleven, is something like that possible? And then maybe a number of eleven-year-olds walk through life who are firmly convinced that their names are “Bärchen” or “Püppi”?
Camilla is said to drink a lot of alcohol again
An actress is also at the center of the latest gossip story that The New has spun about the British king. Accordingly, Camilla drinks a lot of alcohol again because “Charles cheated on her. Ironically, with the Diana actress from the Netflix series ‘The Crown’.” That would actually be bitter. Couldn’t it have at least been the Camilla actress?
About the man who apparently had a new relationship shortly after his recent separation Stephen Mross meanwhile, “Die Aktuell” thinks up the headline: “News from the love tramp”. However, the chosen one is not called Susi.
“Gala” in turn writes about the new house of the actor couple Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck: “Why this luxury mansion is so good for your marriage right now.” Strange line, we think, most marriages would do just fine with a mansion like this at any time.
Helene Fischer can only sleep “when everything is closed”
Actress Ronja Forcher also leads a happy life. “You only dread one thing: the hardware store!” claims “Neue Post”. Luckily she has her Felix: “He turns the many aisles in the hardware store into a fairytale labyrinth. Where was the exit? About the paints or the drills? Felix knows the way. He gallantly helps her to find her way out again, like a hero in a legend.” How nice for Ronja. But which knight will help all the other poor women who wander for hours through the hardware store aisles, intimidated by dangerous tools and signs in a foreign-sounding language? orbital sander! chamfer cutter! Edge milling attachment!
Helene Fischer She doesn’t dread hardware stores, she has another problem: “For the first time she speaks openly about her compulsions” is the title of “The New Woman”. It’s about cupboards, doors, drawers: “When I’m lying in bed, everything has to be closed. That’s a quirk I have. I can only sleep when everything is closed,’ she once said,” we read. This “once”, this “first time”, however, was an interview from January 2018. Is “The New” under the compulsion to mess up ancient Fischer interviews with pseudo-current stories? After all, you’re not alone: ”Shock confession – Why she can’t sleep at night” and “Psycho shock – What secret fears make life difficult for her at night” are titles such as “In” and “OK!”. Incidentally, we too can only sleep when something is closed: our eyes.
Wind and anchor at the same time
Moritz Bleibtreu admits another tick: “Cleaning is a therapeutic thing for me,” he said, according to “Das Neue Blatt”. “If you then remove this limescale manure that has settled around the mixer tap, that’s great. I like that.” In order to be able to really enjoy it, he would of course have to let the lime manure build up first, i.e. not clean for a while – psychologically we don’t really see a way out.
Horst Lichter’s most important thing is his wife, about whom he says in the “Neues Blatt”: “Nada is the wind in my sails that drives me forward and the anchor that keeps me on the ground.” Should she be wind and anchor at the same time be, that would be counterproductive. Is Nada still the steering wheel that guides him, the railing that he holds on to and the fog horn that sometimes blows through his head?
As far as we are concerned, we brood over the horoscope that “Bunte” gives us Pisces: “Put your antennae up and be curious when something surprising comes into your life – it will accompany you for many years.” What, we ask we’re slightly worried, could that be the case? Are we going to have another child? Or is it a letter from the public prosecutor, a nasty skin rash, a camera team from RTL 2? Our hope that it is a beautiful luxury villa is not too high.